Hello,
I have a friend that I am worried about. I told her friends on how i feel and I know she is hurting herself, she s been through counseling but that really didn’t work for her.
And on top of that are friendship has not really been good since I moved. So I worry about her a lot cause she gets depressed a lot as well. Is there any way i can help her out? I was also wondering if there is a spell to make a friendship stronger?
Love, Kristina

Hi Kristina-

It’s very obvious how much you are worried about your friend, so I’d like to help you on two separate levels. If your friend is hurting herself, (what does that mean? Is she cutting herself, drinking too much? ) and you are in fear for her physical health, you need to tell someone who can get her to a hospital, period. Worry about helping her with magick later. The other part is harder, you see, with magick, every true practitioner “agrees” to not force help on anyone who does not want it. This was a hot topic in our coven for awhile. A good story about it is the one about the Good Samaritan who helped the guy on the road to Damascus.

What if the leper was using that time to quietly heal his wounds himself? Who are we to force what we think is right and fair on anyone? Maybe her path is destined to take her on a journey that we see as depression. As hard as that is to swallow for some of us, it s the truth.

The bottom line is, like a first aid responder, we have to ask the person if they want our help first. Even if they are clutching at their throat, we have to look for a sign that they’ve said Yes. When you talk to her, and you must–there can be no secrets with severe depression–and she allows you to help her by using magick, only then can you use the spells that you can find in any of Scott Cunningham’s books. I highly recommend any of his writings for situations such as these.

I have a friend who is deeply, severely depressed and medicates himself with alcohol. After over 20 years and trying everything I can think of, I have had to come to the realization that this is his lot in life, and as much as it hurts me, his choice. My only hope is to laugh with him as much as possible. Yes, he has given me permission to send good thoughts his way, but he also doesn’t believe that it will work, and since most of magick is KNOWING that the spells are working, he is lost.